At least it wasn't Piglet in the City..?

[kjorteo]

Last night's dream was the trailer for the upcoming realistic CGI Winnie the Pooh movie Disney was apparently working on (a la Jungle Book, Lion King, etc.) I've never been a huge Winnie the Pooh fan, but I mean I've never been a huge Jungle Book fan either and I loved the new movie, so sure I'll bite.

We start in a farm setting where a certain baby runt pig is being nursed back to health after being caught in a rainstorm or something. The other major characters are introduced as he recovers. The bee non-aggressively snuggles up to him, and given the stylistic choice to go for total realism, no anthropomorphism, yet still scale the bee's size (and, uh, waspiness) up to match, it pretty much looked like a baby pig spooning a Japanese giant hornet. A bit "uh" but I mean if Charlotte's Web can make spiders endearing, sure I'll give it a chance I guess. 8| Then the pig looks up at a certain bear cub over by the fireplace and "you know these two are going to be best friends forever and form the entire plot of this movie" music starts playing. Etc.

It was very Piglet-centric for a movie ostensibly about and named after Winnie the Pooh, but I guess it works out because stylistically this was literally Babe. Christopher Robin was nowhere to be seen, unless he grew up and became Arthur Hoggett, so I guess the whole "child's imagination and adventures with his stuffed animals" framework is gone and everyone is just real now.

It built up to the big triumphant fanservicey shot of an entire barnful of miscellaneous animals singing... uh... the well-known fanservice song from Winnie the Pooh. Is there one? I'm sure there is and someone in the comments is going to be like "HOW DARE YOUR SUBCONSCIOUS NOT USE (song) HERE" but I DON'T KNOW, I WASN'T REALLY EVER INTO WINNIE THE POOH OKAY. I think it just pulled some other famous Disney number (possibly "A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes"?) and in dream logic context I just sort of knew what they meant and had that "aaa it's the Winnie the Pooh song" reaction.

My ex from two relationships ago was squeeing with excitement proudly showing off this trailer because she somehow landed a voice-acting role and was in this movie, as a gamer(!?) named Snorch. Your guess is as good as mine how gamers get worked into the plot of a Winnie the Pooh movie, since Snorch wasn't actually in the trailer (but the "and (other ex) as Snorch" byline was) but I was told it was kind of a one-scene cameo type deal. Still, that's impressive! Congratulations and good job and etc.

I woke up about an hour before my alarm was going to go off, so I kind of rolled over and went over what I'd just witnessed, trying to commit it to waking memory so I could write this out later, then drifted back to sleep and--

Wait.

Wait just a goddamn minute.

Winnie the Pooh doesn't have a fucking bee in its main cast.

Comments

[kjorteo]

Changing the established Pooh canon so radically must have created quite a buzz.

[kjorteo]

... okay, I deserved that.

[xaq_the_aereon]

Certainly seems to have stirred up a hornet's nest with some people, yes.

[chalcedony_starlings]

beeeeeeeeees

beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees

[xyzzysqrl]

Winnie the Pooh COULD easily have a bee in its main cast though, given Pooh's honey obsession.

I'm just stuck on "you know, the iconic song from Winnie the Pooh" because all the Pooh music I know is extremely situational.

[xaq_the_aereon]

I'm presuming it's the title song from the animated series of a few decades back...which always made me think Winnie was a cat. In my defense I misheard "tubby little cubby" as "tubby little tabby," a mistake I was not aware of until about 12 seconds ago.

[xyzzysqrl]

This one?

When I think of Pooh I always think of this one, because of Kingdom Hearts and also because I had the sing-a-long/read-a-long books as a kid.

(Which means that this is now stuck in my head. Aaaaaa help.)

In conclusion, Winnie the Pooh is a tubby little custard. Thank you.

[xaq_the_aereon]

The 2nd one you linked was the one I was referring to. Guess it was a few more decades than I realized. O_o;

[penguinmayhem]

Winnie The Pooh But Every 'Tigger' Is The Entire Script Of Bee Movie.

[xaq_the_aereon]

Winnie the Pooh but every time Piglet says "Oh d-d-d-d-dear!" it's replaced with a random George Carlin F-Bomb.

[xyzzysqrl]

Winnie the Pooh but the word "Honey" is loudly swear-bleeped and Piglet is not.

[penguinmayhem]

Also every time Eyore speaks the bass gets boosted and the video speeds up by 1%.